What things do I need to avoid when planning for my divorce?

 Posted on October 01, 2020 in Divorce

Ending a marriage can take a devastating emotional, physical and personal toll on everyone involved. That anxiety often leads spouses to make poor decisions in the heat of the moment.

That's why it's crucial that you control your emotions and focus on all the vital things that can help you reach the best outcome and the promise for a new and brighter future.

Avoid unnecessary conflict

An acrimonious divorce process can create long-term effects, such as financial stress, mental health problems, behavioral issues in children and future co-parenting difficulties. With the help of an experienced family law attorney, you can maintain significant control by focusing on three areas:

• Child custody and support
• Dividing property
• Spousal maintenance

Other complicating actions to avoid

While focusing on those three areas can help you begin your new life on solid footing, other actions that can derail, delay or complicate the process, including:

• Having a baby: Filing for divorce while expecting a child typically presents a hurdle to a timely decision. Some judges refuse to grant a divorce depending upon the wife's condition.
• Taking out frustrations on the kids: Children need a secure and peaceful environment to grow. Parents should not discuss their negative issues with their kids but show them that divorce is a way to relieve stress on the family and forge a path for a better future for everyone.
• Increasing debt: Divorce can be expensive. Making major or even minor purchases and increasing your debt load can have long-term financial consequences and reduce your share of marital assets in the divorce settlement.
• Not changing your will: Getting divorced doesn’t automatically negate your estate plan. If you want to keep a soon-to-be-ex from inheriting property, you must craft a new will.
• Dismissing professional support: Too many people going through a divorce are resolved to “go it alone” when dealing with stress. However, seeing a therapist can help you relax, deal with stressful court hearings and help your children through the process.

Consider the merits of alternate dispute resolution

Another potential stress buster is pursuing a collaborative divorce, where your attorney works with your spouse's lawyer to find common ground for dividing custody, income and property. This less adversarial approach can also cut costs and set a positive tone for your future co-parenting relationship.