The holiday season is filled with a lot of joy and fun activities for Texas families. But some divorced parents look to them with dread when navigating parenting time with their former partner.

Parenting plans typically include major holidays like Christmas and Thanksgiving, but others like Halloween are frequently left out. The keys to keeping the day “scary but fun” for your children are planning and cooperation.

Halloween options for co-parents

Since Halloween falls on one night per year and is a community-based holiday focused on trick-or-treating, it can be more challenging for parents to divvy up. Still, many options exist, such as:

New legislation went into effect on Sept. 1, 2021, affecting Texas parents with 50/50 or shared custody orders. The new law expands the beginning and ending times for weekend stays with the child's noncustodial parent.

The reason for the law is to provide children more time with their noncustodial parent (called the “possessory conservator” in the new law). With these new beginning and end times, the possessory conservator is able to have about 46% of the total time with their child.

Here's how it works

The new law allows for an Expanded Standard Possession Order (ESPO). If you are the noncustodial parent, this order will extend your child's time with you. Instead of picking your kids up from school on Friday, you will get them after school on Thursday until Monday morning when you drop them off at school.

No matter how your divorce unfolded, there is no question that divorce can be one of the most challenging experiences a person can go through. Divorce can be a stressful and emotionally draining experience for multiple reasons. For one thing, divorce represents the breakup of a very powerful relationship, the type of relationship which many people expect to last a lifetime. In addition, the divorce process itself is complex and can require an enormous amount of time, energy and money. Given the heavy demands which divorce can impose, people should take the time to develop strategies to cope with the toll of divorce. People in any stage of the process can benefit from these tips – those at the beginning, middle, or finish line.

#1: Reach Out to Friends for Support

As your divorce comes to a close, it can be tempting to isolate yourself from others. Some people withdraw because this seems like a good temporary way to cope with the situation. The truth, though, is that you should try to reach out to your friends for emotional support during this time. Divorce represents the end of a relationship, and this is all the reason to reach out to friends and embrace the existing relationships you have. Your friends can be a tremendous source of comfort and support during this challenging time.

#2: Talk to a Therapist

Another possible strategy is to talk with a professional mental health specialist or therapist. A therapist can also be a great way for you to destress and discuss some of the things on your mind. During a divorce, there can be a tendency to bottle up many of our emotions and thoughts for the sake of pushing the procedure along. Though this may be the case, we still have a need to release our thoughts and process our emotions. Therapists are trained to exchange information and provide resources when it comes to emotional regulation and processing. Talking to a therapist can be a great way to cope with the demands of divorce.

Spousal maintenance – also referred to as “alimony” in many jurisdictions outside of Texas – continues to be among the most controversial issues in family law. This is partly because of media influence. Some spousal maintenance cases – such as those involving celebrities – are published in the mainstream media, and sometimes the amounts of maintenance awards can be astounding to observers. Spousal maintenance won’t stop being controversial anytime soon, but the reality of maintenance is quite different from what lay people often assume. In this post, we’re going to give a quick review of spousal maintenance and how this concept works here in Texas.

Spousal Maintenance is Based on Two Basic Conditions

Not only is spousal maintenance not award in all cases, the qualifications for spousal maintenance are actually quite high in Texas. To qualify for spousal maintenance, the requesting spouse needs to meet two conditions: (1) the requesting doesn’t have the means to provide for basic needs at the time of the divorce, and (2) one of four other circumstances must be present:

(a) The provisioning spouse must have been convicted of domestic violence within two years of the divorce filing

Thanksgiving and Christmas are full of robust and joyful times. But if you and your child's other parent have a challenging relationship, the season can be anything but jolly.

You and your co-parent have many factors to consider when scheduling parenting time, such as your kids’ ages, the distance between households, family religious beliefs and traditions.Much of what you decide depends upon how well the two of you get along. If it's a combustible relationship, it's best to put differences aside and focus on your children's happiness.

Setting a sensible schedule

Holiday schedules are usually included in your Texas parenting plan, but co-parents typically choose one of two ways to share time.

Recently, we have discussed some of the basics regarding child support awards and spousal maintenance awards. As we saw, both of these obligations are based on complex systems built into the fabric of Texas family law. What we didn’t discuss in any detail, however, is the fact that both of these obligations can be modified after an initial determination. Depending on the circumstances at hand, a Texas judge can decide to change or, in the case of spousal maintenance, even eliminate an obligation altogether.

In this post, we will discuss some of the factors which go into the decision-making process underlying these modifications.

Modifying a Texas Child Support Award

As mentioned, child support awards are determined according to a well-established system in Texas. But, after an award has been created, this doesn’t mean that this obligation will remain in place indefinitely. Whenever there is a significant change in either parent's life, or the child's life, this change may be sufficient to amend the award.

As hard as it may be for younger people to believe, at one time, divorce was a very rare occurrence. In fact, in certain eras, divorce was almost taboo, something approaching a scandal. Things have changed substantially in recent decades, and now divorce is exceedingly common. What's more, the stigma of divorce has gradually dissipated as well. The stigma has receded in tandem with the increased frequency of divorce and changing perception of marriage and relationships in general.

In this post, we will look at some recent statistics on marriage and divorce to get a sense of what's going on here in the Lone Star State.

Divorce Rates in the State of Texas

Let's look at data from a few years ago, as this data are more readily available. Back in 2017, the divorce rate in Texas was 2.2 per 1,000 inhabitants. This rate represents a steady decrease in recent years. For instance, back in 1990, Texas had a divorce rate which was more than double the current rate at 5.5 per 1,000 inhabitants. By 2007, the rate had dropped to 3.3, and then in 2016 it was 2.6. So, although divorce is much more common now than it was several generations ago, the rate of divorce in Texas has actually been declining in the recent past.

Common law marriage is a rapidly disappearing concept in American family law. This is reflected in the fact that very few states throughout the country recognize common law marriage in their legal system. Texas is among the few states left in the union which still recognize this unique institution. In this post, we will discuss the basics of common law marriage here in Texas, highlight how this institution can be created, and point out the contexts in which this institution has the most significance.

Basics of Common Law Marriage

Common law marriage – commonly known as “marriage without formalities” or “informal marriage” in Texas law – describes a relationship which has the outward appearance of marriage without the formality of marriage. In other words, the couple doesn’t have a certificate of marriage signed and approved by the state. The couple has many of the external signs of being married, such as living together, sharing bank accounts, sharing expenses, filing joint tax returns, and so forth.

If a marriage is in fact a common law marriage and is recognized as such by the state, then the couple will have the same privileges and benefits as couples who are formally married. Hence, the determination of whether a common law marriage is valid is a highly important matter.

Texas classrooms are opening as schools attempt to return to the new normal. Along with in-school learning, students are once again participating in a wide variety of extracurriculars in sports, music and other social groups. Some divorced parents may struggle with this new schedule. But is it possible to alter your current custody or visitation order?

Considerations for modifying parenting plans

The Texas Family Code doesn’t include the phrase “extracurricular activities” when establishing or modifying parenting plans. If you want to change a custody or visitation order, the court only considers specific factors, including:

• The child's age and safety
• The original custody and visitation orders
• Distance between the two parents’ homes
• Financial impacts

The judge has 100% discretion in these requests with the overriding objective of ruling in the child's best interests, even if a modification would make the situation easier for you or the other parent.

You and your former or soon-to-be-former spouse have already gone through a lot. Divorce is never easy, especially when you have kids and hard or angry feelings persist with your ex-partner.Chances are you have diligently worked to keep those emotions in check to avoid making things harder for you and your children. Now your goal becomes creating a peaceful co-parenting relationship.

Positive steps for healthy and productive co-parenting

Psychological studies show children of divorce can thrive when both parents remain actively and positively engaged in their lives. It may take a lot of work to get to a peaceful place with your ex, but here are some signs you are accomplishing your goal:

• Sticking to the schedule: Having a predetermined plan makes the arrangement easier for everyone and shows that you and your former spouse can honor your commitments to your children.
• Being flexible: While this might seem like a contradiction, stuff happens! It's a healthy sign when you’re willing to accommodate your ex's last-minute work emergency. They’re likely to do the same for you.
• Talking to each other: When last-minute adjustments are necessary, co-parents in a healthy relationship talk to each other first before telling their kids about a change in the schedule.
• Attending events together: Healthy co-parents can attend their children's sporting events, recitals or other activities together without any drama by putting their kids first.
• Recognizing each other's purpose: Even if little or no love remains between you and your ex, both of you are the most important people in your children's world.

Agree to disagree, and move on

Chances are you and your ex-spouse didn’t see eye-to-eye when your marriage was happy, and you almost certainly will continue to disagree about many things in the future. A big part of avoiding angry confrontations is having an experienced lawyer draft a comprehensive parenting plan.

Happily married Texas couples don’t agree about every matter regarding their children. So, there's no reason to expect that co-parenting with your former spouse will be a cakewalk.

The trick is – despite any bitter or angry feelings you may still have for your ex – to put those emotions aside and focus on what's best for your children when parenting disputes arise.

Two ways to problem-solve with your co-parent

Successful co-parenting requires patience, open communication and empathy. That may sound like a tall order for some. Depending on the space you and your ex are in, here are two problem-solving methods to consider:

Adoption can be a wonderful way for a child to receive a caring, loving parent. As most readers know, adoption is the formal transferring of parental rights to another person who may or may not be related to the child. The circumstances under which adoption may arise can vary tremendously. In some cases, a stepparent may choose to adopt the child of his or her spouse; in other cases, a person may choose to adopt simply because of a desire to parent a child. Finally, infertility may lead others to adopt. Whatever the case may be, the procedure for adopting a child in Texas is complex and requires expert guidance to fully traverse.

In this post, we will go over the essentials of the adoption process; those who would like to learn more are encouraged to contact The Ramage Law Group for more information.

Adoption vs. Conservatorship

Before discussing the adoption procedure, we should point out that adoption is legally distinguishable from another kind of custody – conservatorship. In the State of Texas, a court may grant a non-biological relative or third-party a conservatorship over a child for numerous possible reasons. This conservatorship bestows upon the holder various rights which are similar to the rights possessed by a biological parent. However, conservatorship is distinct from legal parenthood on several critical points. For one, a child who has a conservator does not automatically have inheritance rights; this is different from a parent-child relationship in which the child has automatic inheritance rights. What's more, the full rights of the conservatorship are actually limited to those which have been specifically identified by the court. This is unlike a legal parent who has full rights. And finally, conservatorships can always be subject to change in the future. In an adoption, the parent-child relationship is established and is not subject to change.

Spousal maintenance – also referred to as “alimony” in many states throughout the nation – refers to financial support given to a person by that person's former spouse. Spousal maintenance can be given for a variety of different reasons in the State of Texas. When considering spousal maintenance, Texas judges conduct a case-by-case analysis and give weight to a range of factors; however, certain conditions must be present in order for a spousal maintenance request to be considered initially. Judges have some leeway in determining whether maintenance is appropriate in a given situation, but Texas law is rather strict in its treatment of the duration and amount of maintenance orders.

In this post, we will discuss the qualifications of spousal maintenance, and the standing presumption against maintenance in Texas. We will also go over some of the factors which play into spousal maintenance determinations, and how duration is decided.

Qualifications of Spousal Maintenance in Texas Law

Under Texas law, either spouse can request spousal maintenance following a divorce. But, in order for a maintenance request to even be considered, the requesting spouse must demonstrate that he or she lacks the ability to provide for essential or basic minimum needs. In addition, once that hurdle is met, the requesting spouse must show that at least one of four conditions are present: (1) the maintenance giving spouse was convicted of domestic violence within the last two years before the filing of the divorce, (2) the couple was married for a minimum of 10 years, and the requesting spouse lacks the ability to provide for basic minimum needs, (3) the requesting spouse possesses a physical or mental disability which impedes his or her ability to provide for basic minimum needs, or (4) the requesting spouse must take care of a child who requires supervision due to a physical or mental disability, and this parental responsibility inhibits the spouse from being self-supportive.

At one point or another, most people have heard of the process referred to as “mediation” in family law. Most people understand that mediation is essentially an alternative to the traditional, court-based divorce process. However, few people know much about the details of how the mediation process works. Mediation is an increasingly common alternative, both in Texas and throughout the nation, mainly because it offers several key advantages. Depending on the specifics of the situation, mediation can be a viable method for developing the agreements (i.e. child custody, visitation, etc.) necessary to accomplish a divorce.

In this post, we will go over the essentials of the mediation procedure here in Texas. Then, we will point out the two main advantages of this process.

Basic Overview of the Mediation Process

Mediation has a formal structure which is consistent from one case to another; however, the results of any given mediation depend completely on the facts, circumstances and desires of the parties involved. In other words, although the mediation structure is predictable, the outcome of any given mediation is not so predictable. A single person will assume the role of the “mediator” in the mediation process. This person literally acts as the facilitator who assists both sides of the aisle in coming to agreements on the disputes of the divorce. In mediation, both sides attempt to independently come to agreement on any disputed issues of the divorce, such as child custody, visitation, property division, asset protection, alimony and so forth.

In most cases, child support payments end in Texas when your child graduates from high school or turns 18 years old, whichever comes last.For example, if your child is still enrolled in high school after turning 18, support continues until they graduate. If they graduate at age 17 or younger, support typically ends the same month they turn 18 years old.

Support may continue for children with disabilities

There are exceptions. Support payments may be required beyond a child's 18th birthday and high school graduation in certain circumstances. If the child has a disability, support can be ordered for an “indefinite” period. For that to happen, the court must believe that:

1. The child requires substantial supervision and treatment.
2. The child cannot care for themselves due to a mental or physical disability, regardless of whether they live at home or in an assisted living facility.
3. The child's disability existed or was known to exist before they turn 18 years old.

The formula for calculating support for a child with special needs is different from a standard child support order. Payments are actually established on a case-by-case basis.

Going through a divorce can be a devastating experience. It can be even more challenging under the bright lights of the social media age. If you are a fervent user of Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or other platforms, it's vital to your future to understand how these applications can affect the outcome of your divorce.

Social media dos and don’ts during divorce

So many Texans’ lives are chronicled these days on social media. But once you decide to end your marriage, you need to change your social media habits, since anything you post may be used against you in court. Here are some general rules for managing your online presence:

What you should do with your social media accounts:

• If possible, stop using Facebook, Twitter and Instagram until your divorce is final
• Change your passwords so your spouse or others can’t access your accounts
• Change your security to the highest level possible to restrict what others can see
• Monitor your children's social media activity

What you should NOT do on social media:

• Vent against your soon-to-be-ex or refer to them at all
• Mention anything about your divorce
• Post photos that cast you in a negative light
• Discuss controversial or unpleasant topics
• Mention or post photos of a new love interest
• Never post pictures of a new romantic partner with your children
• Boast about or show pictures of expensive purchases, such as a new car

Social media silence is golden

Sometimes, divorcing spouses attempt to mess with each other by posting unkind messages or pictures. Don’t take the bait. Instead, if your spouse makes threatening or rude comments or exercises any of the behaviors above, alert your attorney as it may be evidence that can help your case.

One of the central aspects of child care is parental visitation. When a married couple breaks up, they need to develop a child custody agreement. The custody agreement determines certain things such as who will have primary physical custody, shared legal custody, and so forth. Visitation rights are another key part of caring for the child shared between the parties. In this post, we will lay out the basics on how the State of Texas deals with this critically important matter.

Texas Believes in the Necessity of Dual Parental Involvement

The first thing to know when it comes to visitation rights in Texas is that our system believes that the welfare of children is best promoted by having involving from both parents. This is sort of the “first principle” when it comes to understanding how our visitation rights work. Unless a parent is unstable, or potentially dangerous, the State of Texas adheres to the notion that a child should have regular contact with both parents. This principle informs Texas's laws on visitation, as is reflects in Texas's “Standard Possession Order,” which we will discuss below.

Parents Can Develop Their Own Visitation Schedules

The next thing to know is that parents are able to develop their own visitation schedules if they choose to do so. In some ways, this is the best option, because parents often have unusual schedules which may make following a pre-arranged schedule a difficult task. Suppose one parent is a police officer or firefighter; that parent may be called into work at random times with very little notice. Or, that parent may have to work very long hours during a particular stretch of time, which prevents that parent from being able to see his or her child on a certain schedule. The key point is that Texas courts will generally approve a visitation schedule developed independently by parents.

If your spouse or partner avoids being served legal orders through conventional methods, Texas now allows service of process through social media and email. This change took effect at the beginning of 2021, after the Texas Supreme Court approved changes to rules in the state.

Some people try to evade service processors, so they can avoid receiving divorce petitions, custody orders, and other legal documents. The law change makes it much easier for you to serve legal documents on a current or former spouse. However, you still have to try the old-fashioned ways first.

First, try to serve documents the traditional way

Your first attempts to serve legal documents must include these traditional methods:

The thought of ending a once-loving relationship can be bad enough on its own, but adding an uncertain financial future to the equation presents an extra layer of fear and anxiety to any divorce between Texas spouses.

But the good news is there are steps you can take to protect your new life as a single person. First, consult with an experienced and compassionate family law attorney who can guide you through the process.

Five steps to protect your future financial well-being

In addition to charting a budget for paying monthly bills, including mortgage or rent, utilities and other expenses, it's vital to take steps to protect assets by:

Prenuptial agreements – also referred to as “premarital agreements” in Texas – are a curious thing in the context of marriage. On the one hand, many people insist that these agreements are necessary to ensure that no spouse is unfairly impacted by a divorce. On the other hand, prenuptial agreements are not exactly the most romantic things, and in some ways seem incongruous with the general purpose of marriage to begin with. The best approach is likely to be somewhere in the middle: use prenups when necessary, but they may not always be necessary. Texas is a community property state, which has a decisive role in property division in divorces without a prenuptial agreement. If a couple feels that this default position is fine, then perhaps a prenup is simply not necessary.

In this post, we’d like to give a basic overview of how courts treat prenuptial agreements. Most readers have at least a general idea of how these agreements work. A prenuptial agreement is a contract which predetermines things such as property division, asset protection, inheritance, debt responsibility, and so forth. But how do courts treat these agreements? Let's discuss in a bit of detail.

Texas Courts Apply Basic Contract Law Principles to Agreements

Chapter 4 of Subtitle (1)(B) within the Texas Family Code deals with both premarital and marital property agreements. This is where we can find the specific rules which govern prenuptial agreements. When it comes to the enforcement of these agreements, if we look at the code, we can see that Texas courts apply many of the basic principles of contract law. This means, for instance, that prenuptial agreements must be entered into voluntarily in order to be upheld. This is taken right from basic contract law which states that there must be a valid “acceptance” to create a contract.